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NSFW TMI Questions:
Haven't done one of these for a long time, so here goes:
1. Are you a virgin?
Is the Pope Jewish??
2. Does anyone besides you know your bra/penis size?
Quite a lot of people know my penis size. I've never yet felt the need to wear a bra.
3. Do you know anyone who has any STDs?
No, but I can think of several people who remind me of STDs.
4. Were you married when you first lost your virginity?
I've never been married.
5. Do you swear under celibacy?
Yes. I'm celibate and it makes me swear.
6. When did you first lose your virginity? If you haven't, when would you like to?
When I was 14. Check the 'virginity' tag on my blog for the full story.
7. Have you ever gotten tricked into aphrodisiacs or alcohol for sex?
I wouldn't need to be - I love alcohol and as for anything aphrodisiac, bring it on!!
8. Have you walked in on someone masturbating/having sex?
No - I wish! Though once, when I organised a school trip, I walked in on a couple who had just finished fucking...
9. Have you ever seen someone masturbate or have sex with their permission?
Yes - see my posts tagged 'kirby'
10. Where is the weirdest place you have had sex?
I once masturbated in front of the altar of a church, does that count? Otherwise, I remember talking an ex into doing it in the medieval crypt of the Louvre, but we couldn't find a time when it was quiet enough.
11. If you had to chose one, would you have outdoor sex or car sex?
Outdoor. Cars are cramped.
12. When was the age you first masturbated? Whether you knew it or not?
I was 12, and I knew it - though only when I'd finished. The 'anniversary' tag will lead you to the story.
13. Have you ever helped someone "finish"?
Of course. I'm polite.
14. Have you ever had an erection in the past month?
Um, yes... this morning when I woke up
15. When was the last time you have had an erection?
16. Have you ever had an erection and someone noticed?
Other than when having sex? Not that I can think of
17. What is your method of masturbation?
Thumb and two fingers, taking full advantage of my foreskin
18. What is your bra/penis size?
19. Has anyone seen your private parts other than yourself or a family member?
Everyone I've had sex with - and of course the people I flash at in the street.
20. What is the strangest thing you have ever put up your vagina/anus?
An umbrella handle.
21. Do you like rough sex or intimate sex better?
Do I have to choose? Can't I have rough intimate sex?
22. When was the last time you masturbated?
23. When was the last time you had sex?
Oh God, far too long ago!
24. When was the last time you watched porn?
About five minutes ago (just before I started doing this)
25. Have you ever bought a sex toy? If so, which one did you buy last? First sex toy? If not, which one do you plan on buying when you do?
I have a box of sex toys. My first was probably a cockring, and the latest must be my icejack. I'd like an anal vibrator.
26. Which not-genital part of your body do you like being touched?
My ears and neck.
27. Which genital part of your body do you like being touched?
Umm... my genitals??
28. What color/type of underwear are you wearing?
white DNKY boxer briefs - without the button, which my dog chewed off
29. Have you ever sent someone a picture or video of you in the nude? Did it include sexual actions?
Yes; I'm happy to share my sexy selfies if people send me a request by email.
30. Have you ever posted a picture of image of you in the nude on a website? Did it include sexual actions?
Yes, on here; now they are on a password-protected blog.
31. Have you ever anonymously sent/posted a picture or video of yourself in the nude? Did it include sexual actions?
32. Have you anonymously sent a sexual ask to someone on tumblr?
I'm not into anonymity
33. When was the last time you have had a wet dream?
I've only ever had a very few - perhaps two or three in my whole life that I remember
34. Which wet dream was your favorite?
One where I was on a bus opposite a guy in tennis shorts, and we ended up having sex
35. Is there a friend you would willingly have sex with?
No. At the moment none of my friends come into that category. I should do something about that...
36. Is there a celebrity/character you would willingly have sex with?
Yes, dozens! Do I have to choose? Jude Law or Louis Garrel.
37. Have you ever masturbated with someone?
Many times - although I've never had a "buddy-jerk", I'd like to do that.
38. Have you ever took a shower with someone that is not a family member?
Yes - at a gym, swimming pool or after a massage workshop.
39. Favorite sexual position?
Face down with my man on top of me
40. Do you like being called a slut or whore in bed?
Call me whatever you like as long as you're turning me on!
41. Are you into any BDSM?
Yes. Not done it for ages, but would love to get back into it.
42. Have you ever wanted to have sex with someone but knew you couldnt for any reason? Why?
Mainly because they weren't interested.
43. Turn on's?
the idea that we're soon going to do it again
44. Turn off's?
45. Have you ever had a sexual fantasy about someone? Was it about anyone other than your lover?
Too many times to mention. Usually one of my students.
46. Have you ever had phone sex? Video sex? Chat box sex?
Yes, yes and yes.
47. What was the weirdest thing that has ever turned you on?
maybe that church altar?
48. Do you like dirty talk?
once I'm very turned on, yes.
49. Are you loud or quiet during sex? Masturbation?
VERY loud during sex, pretty quiet during masturbation
50. Have you ever been interrupted during sex or masturbation? Who/what?
Yes; some bastard phoned me from a different time zone and completely broke my stride.
51. Most embarrassing sex/masturbation story?
when I was about 13 and going to masturbate onto my favourite fetish tee shirt and my mother walked into my room. Fortunately I hadn't started...
52. Most hilarious sex/masturbation story?
Can't think of one.
53. What kind of porn do you like to watch?
All kinds, though I'm not much into fisting
54. First type of porn you have ever watched? (ie. lesbian, hentai, threesome)
Two guys in a locker room who whipped each other with their towels, then fucked
55. What was the most recent type of porn you have ever watched? What category was it under?
56. Most hilarious/stupidest porn you have ever watched?
porn is NEVER stupid!!
57. Have you ever fantasized over someone older than you? How much older? Younger? How much younger?
I prefer younger. Fortunately, the older I get the more of them there are
58. Favorite sex toy (if any)?
59. Have you ever had to break up with/divorce someone because you weren't satisfied with their sex?
No. What hurt most in one breakup was that the sex had been so good
60. Have you ever used anything/gotten any surgeries to improve sexual performance/feel?
No, and I don't think I ever would. But who knows?
61. If someone you knew asked for a nude image, would you do it? What about a tumblr follower?
absolutely no problem
62. Have you ever told someone any wet dreams/fantasies you've had about them?
No, I don't think I've ever done that
63. Do you like to have sex like they do in pornos?
Yes - I mean, they have sex in pornos, and I like to have sex....
64. Have you ever confessed to someone that you got an erection over them? What about masturbated to them?
65. Are you able to be secretive when you masturbate? (like able to be quiet so no one can hear?)
66. When was the first time you achieved orgasm?
see above, about first masturbation
67. Is there only one way so far that you have been able to achieve orgasm? (ie. only by using toys, only from 1 position,only from masturbating a certain way)
No, there are several ways. Currently my favourite is playing the water from the shower head against my cock until I cum
68. Favorite type of oral?
giving and receiving
69. Strangest sexual positon you've tried?
can't think of one
70. Have you ever made up a sexual postion?
I don't think so - is that a challenge?
71. Do you like to be dominant or submissive?
Both - depends on the parnter
72. Have you ever masturbated to someone?
I don't know if I understand this question - but I did once get a guy to undress while I watched him and masturbated
73. Have you ever masturbated because your sexual partner wasn't there when you needed them?
74. Have you ever had a one night stand? Do you still keep in contact with them?
75. Have you ever had a friends with benefits? Are they still beneficial?
No. That would be nice.
76. Have you ever had sex with someone who wasnt your partner?
Most of the people I've had sex with weren't my partner
77. Has any of your partners had sex with someone else?
78. Have you ever gotten pregnant? Were they your lover's or someone else's?
Not so far...
79. Birth control or condoms?
Condoms ARE a form of birth control, no?
80. Do you ever masturbate to porn?
81. Does anyone know you masturbate? Did you have to tell them?
No. No one knows I masturbate. I am the only person on the planet who is not known to masturbate.
82. Did your parents ever find out you were sexually active?
Yes - when I caught the clap at 15yo
83. Do you have any STDs?
Not at the moment
84. Have you ever masturbated to a fictonal character or celebrity?
Fictional character, no; celebrity, many times
85. Have you ever had sex during "7 minutes in heaven"?
I don't know if I understand this question
86. Spit or swallow? Or do you not like oral?
Swallow, of course!
87. Have you ever been rejected for sex? Have you ever rejected someone else?
88. Do you have someone who said they are willing to take away your virginity if you havent lost it by a set age or if you just want to have a good time?
89. Have you ever experimented with the opposite sex?
Yes. I think the story of that is on here somewhere too.
90. When you first lost your virginity, was it intended or spontaneous?
Completely intended on my part. Even at 14yo I knew exactly what I was doing.
91. Has anyone ever walked in when you were taking a shower with someone?
92. Did you ever tell someone once you lost your virginity?
93. Does your lover know if you have masturbated?
I don't have a lover at the moment, but when I last did I would sometimes masturbate in front of him
94. Does your lover know that you want to have sex with them but cant?
95. Do you like masturbation?
Ever so slightly...
96. (Asker's ask) If i were to ask you if we could have sex, would you say yes?
Depends who you are! Ask me!!